it's been such a long time that i may as well have forgotten how to write. i'll try nevertheless. i'm back at home for starters and i'm doing the self-same things i do here, ever so regularly. sleeping till slightly late, having the long-drawn conversations with 'the parents', but ablutions and bathing every day but i'm not complaining so much because i do them quite unwittingly.
Before I tell about the last 10 days or something, i will tell that as of now, i'm loving tennis. yesterday also, after dinner, despite mum's repeated no-no-no's me and debo went and played tennis in the club. But it was a mud court against cement, which gives better bounce to the ball, i think. But I also changed my racquet, so it took me a while to get used to that also. But it was very very satisfying. Debo like always was acting smart (The other day, he told me that even if he's at his ugliest best, mum n dad would've been prouder having him than I). He played really well. I wonder if it is his talent or my lack of it that makes him emerge better. Anyhow, the thing with him is that, he plays a lot of sports and if that's the threshold of a decent sports-man, he's just that much shorter in all of them, thereby not making it to any sport swimmingly.
But ya, this other couple of players came along and asked us if we wanted to play doubles with them and we acquiesced obviously. For the first time I played a match, and it was revealing I tell you.
Anyhow, that's that about tennis. Today's i'm leaving for rajasthan all over again. This time with my family and the extended one. I hope to have lottttss of fun, and Zoo will be missed :D If however, anyone wants anything from Jaipur, let know. It's going to be a bit of an unorganized and fun trip i feel because our tickets are not confirmed and we're giving it a shot anyway. This will be a test for mumma's patience. She's cribbed ample about it anyway. But she's usually like that when we're leaving for some place. She will keep working and working and then she will keep complaining about our not doing anything. She delegates also very badly. Like I peel potatoes while she cooks them. Like she's simon and i'm garfunkel :( It's just that I've heard simon sing alone and not garfunkel and also i think i heard it in a film. Or might it be because my dad perhaps prompted my mum to buy some Satyam shares, which obviously she's vastly disgusted about, what with the fiasco Ramalinga Raju has put his company in. Why Why I ask did he have to do this to Satyam. Like corporate really needed this because otherwise it was shining and thriving right??
Anyway, all of last week, we worked on Account Planning workshop with O & M on Tata Sky. Such a horrible account I must say. How will people feel about it if it's gone?? Not badly sure. It's not like it's a nail/mole that you'd hate to part with. Anyhow, this business of positioning is very cryptic. I wonder, if people must feel close to brands had it not been for marketing! Anyhow, working with disparate individuals, who may have wished to swap groups if that were possible was worth undergoing. It just told reams about how it can be sooo difficult to work in teams even in real organizations. Even so, in all the psychometric tests that we're asked to take for companies, working in teams is an imperative they invariable test. I dont know if I must answer correctly or correctly. Because I perform perhaps better when I'm alone but I'm still a team player and maybe it's the former that they'd deem more appropriate to recruit.
Then again, there are other things. Year's coming to an end. A new one is going to begin. My resolution is to start playing tennis matches :D Maybe it's time for me to start thinking about atp, no no not wta yet :d I will read more like always. I mean, like I always resolve. And Im going to be placed, yes I'd better be placed. And if that happens, I resolve to work very hard.
Then I'm extremely glad that this last leap year happened or I would've missed a lot. If I dont write this year, I'll write next year ofcourse but i'd probably toggle back and think about the last year and write about it maybe. (In any case, making public promises makes you commit a little more to the cause maybe.)
But this or that, I'm thankful for the good things and extremely grateful for all the lovely things and peoples and times and songs and dances and hang-overs and meditations and promises and their fulfilments. I'm hopeful that the not-so-lovely ones can teach me a lesson. I'm indeed glad for the journey with both this and that :)
Later
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
of some more of the same things!
it's been a long time since I wrote. I think i'm forgetting how to write but that can't be because there is no such thing, that would be like forgetting to think and experience and see and observe and all of that.
anyway this past week has been good fun. i've had different kind of classes in modelling and analytics and in some market research.
there was a weekend, which I spent outside of the campus with the Kazirangan school friend and his friend, both of whom kept me interesting company over the weekend. In my mind, I would think about a lot of things that they would say and do and I thought some of them were very amusing. But I got to eat some nice Gujju and sweet food, especially made at home. I got to see how Gujarati sounds properly. I mean after having spent a lot of time in Ahmedabad also, there is little exposure we've had to Gujarati culture.
Anyhow, I saw Transporter 3, which was stylish and good-looking and really really fancy. I mean the violence also seemed less painful maybe. And driving and hitting suddenly delight me I think. I also saw Dil Kabaddi and I don't know whether to like it or dislike it. I mean there were times in the film when I liked it a lot and there were others when I hated it. Overall I think the sex comedy was good fun, one could laugh at it, laugh with it and scorn at it. Plural reactions and feelings it evoked in a matter of 2 hours. But I love the actors. There is no Abhishekness or Priyankaness in them. They are just brutally next-door and pretty in that sense. I mean I like it when I see people repeat clothes in films, keep their hair slightly tousled and not ironed all the time. I like it when lips look black, eyes look less kohly and when some pimples and some wrinkles and some fat show. I think that's very sexy.
Anyway, so we had a big report and presentation to make, which were both done at the nick of time. We worked in a fairly haphazard way with other group members. It was slipshoddy and I think more than anything else, it turned out to be a collection of disconnected thoughts thus leading to no cohesiveness. But these days that's how working on assignments with group members has become. Not like work, where more often than not we would find seniors and juniors who will make us go round their little fingers and who will go round our little fingers, respectively, everyone in college is at the same level. So group exercises have lately been split into many individual parts, where only the person who does that small bit becomes responsible for that part. Eventually, who would be responsible for the final part also becomes a matter of great concern and contention. Infact, work suffers immensely because no one feels it's their baby. Anyway, I like brainstorming and I like debating over issues, discussing things over and all that, but I don't think it happens anymore. Not in token, unreal assignments in college.
Anyway, I've dabbled with many sports lately. I was on tennis, but since PK has gone, I've played Badminton, in which I continue to s**k. I've also played table-tennis in which I continue to lose track of the ball. But anyhow, one day suddenly I think, I will show phenomenal improvement when everyone will look at my game with wonder and awe and admiration. But till such time, I will continue to dabble.
We've also gotten a good amount of shock from the placements committee. I may not be passing out with a job in my hand, what with the stupid meltdown, which had to and absolutely had to intervene and conspire against innocent children like me (sob..sob) and I think, there are shocks that I've still not been able to absorb properly, therefore I send my expressions-of-interest for any company coming to the campus, much later than the deadline is over. But I also don't forget to apologize to the committee. But then I dont know how to do this. To hedge my risk, I may have to sit for all companies that come to the campus, but if I do this, I may miss out on the righer and the more preferred companies since we will be out of the process at the first event of any company showing any interest in any candidate, in essence obliterating every company and every single candidate on the same level. Look what the world has come to (sob sob again)
O, lately I have been very fascinated with pictures. I love to look and appreciate them a lot. Lately also, Ive come across better photographers and cameras and subjects I think. But whatever it is, it's great to look at pictures and look at them again and again. Infact, I have this very very interesting picture on my desktop, with a baby held so close that he can probably hear the heartbeat :D, and it doesnt stop to fascinate me. When it does, it will be removed from my desktop and stored with good care in the archives. I think, it's also got to do with babies. I mean, there is something very telling about pictures with babies and how they are held or looked at. I mean, Freud might have something to say on it, on why such pictures inspire a lot of admiration.
Anyhow, I have to go and watch 'Shwas', an interesting Marathi film. So while I catch up with it, let everyone else sleep and dream really well!
Later
anyway this past week has been good fun. i've had different kind of classes in modelling and analytics and in some market research.
there was a weekend, which I spent outside of the campus with the Kazirangan school friend and his friend, both of whom kept me interesting company over the weekend. In my mind, I would think about a lot of things that they would say and do and I thought some of them were very amusing. But I got to eat some nice Gujju and sweet food, especially made at home. I got to see how Gujarati sounds properly. I mean after having spent a lot of time in Ahmedabad also, there is little exposure we've had to Gujarati culture.
Anyhow, I saw Transporter 3, which was stylish and good-looking and really really fancy. I mean the violence also seemed less painful maybe. And driving and hitting suddenly delight me I think. I also saw Dil Kabaddi and I don't know whether to like it or dislike it. I mean there were times in the film when I liked it a lot and there were others when I hated it. Overall I think the sex comedy was good fun, one could laugh at it, laugh with it and scorn at it. Plural reactions and feelings it evoked in a matter of 2 hours. But I love the actors. There is no Abhishekness or Priyankaness in them. They are just brutally next-door and pretty in that sense. I mean I like it when I see people repeat clothes in films, keep their hair slightly tousled and not ironed all the time. I like it when lips look black, eyes look less kohly and when some pimples and some wrinkles and some fat show. I think that's very sexy.
Anyway, so we had a big report and presentation to make, which were both done at the nick of time. We worked in a fairly haphazard way with other group members. It was slipshoddy and I think more than anything else, it turned out to be a collection of disconnected thoughts thus leading to no cohesiveness. But these days that's how working on assignments with group members has become. Not like work, where more often than not we would find seniors and juniors who will make us go round their little fingers and who will go round our little fingers, respectively, everyone in college is at the same level. So group exercises have lately been split into many individual parts, where only the person who does that small bit becomes responsible for that part. Eventually, who would be responsible for the final part also becomes a matter of great concern and contention. Infact, work suffers immensely because no one feels it's their baby. Anyway, I like brainstorming and I like debating over issues, discussing things over and all that, but I don't think it happens anymore. Not in token, unreal assignments in college.
Anyway, I've dabbled with many sports lately. I was on tennis, but since PK has gone, I've played Badminton, in which I continue to s**k. I've also played table-tennis in which I continue to lose track of the ball. But anyhow, one day suddenly I think, I will show phenomenal improvement when everyone will look at my game with wonder and awe and admiration. But till such time, I will continue to dabble.
We've also gotten a good amount of shock from the placements committee. I may not be passing out with a job in my hand, what with the stupid meltdown, which had to and absolutely had to intervene and conspire against innocent children like me (sob..sob) and I think, there are shocks that I've still not been able to absorb properly, therefore I send my expressions-of-interest for any company coming to the campus, much later than the deadline is over. But I also don't forget to apologize to the committee. But then I dont know how to do this. To hedge my risk, I may have to sit for all companies that come to the campus, but if I do this, I may miss out on the righer and the more preferred companies since we will be out of the process at the first event of any company showing any interest in any candidate, in essence obliterating every company and every single candidate on the same level. Look what the world has come to (sob sob again)
O, lately I have been very fascinated with pictures. I love to look and appreciate them a lot. Lately also, Ive come across better photographers and cameras and subjects I think. But whatever it is, it's great to look at pictures and look at them again and again. Infact, I have this very very interesting picture on my desktop, with a baby held so close that he can probably hear the heartbeat :D, and it doesnt stop to fascinate me. When it does, it will be removed from my desktop and stored with good care in the archives. I think, it's also got to do with babies. I mean, there is something very telling about pictures with babies and how they are held or looked at. I mean, Freud might have something to say on it, on why such pictures inspire a lot of admiration.
Anyhow, I have to go and watch 'Shwas', an interesting Marathi film. So while I catch up with it, let everyone else sleep and dream really well!
Later
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Nike's global optimization strategy
We have a massive International Marketing assignment on 'Using consumer Intelligence to create global brands' and we're using Nike's case study.
It's quite interesting and I'm reading this book called 'A new brand world', gifted by Zoo and written by Scott Bedbury, the man who worked for athletic shoes as well as caffeine (read Nike and Starbucks), which by the way are both so interesting and important parts of contemporary cultural vernacular.
Anyhow, I came back to Indore from a very homey MICAmpaign there. Home was brilliant as usual. I fought with mummy over stepping on the wet floor after mopping and over getting proper tickets booked and taking the print-outs on time with my dad and over everything else with my brother. And I also freaked out when my tickets were not done. But as a result I am educated far more in e-ticket booking rules and about how easily my eyes well up sometimes.
Anyhow, we played tennis again after a longish sabbatical. After the first few knocks, our rust also gave way to more freeflowing action :) PK played with her new racquet and I with my new shoes. But they totally bit and bit and now my toe pinkie is a splinters. :( but I will get used to my shoes while they take the shape of my feet, which i'm told are gigantic.
Till I'm able to finish this case on Nike and reading this book, I hope to not call it a night.
Later
It's quite interesting and I'm reading this book called 'A new brand world', gifted by Zoo and written by Scott Bedbury, the man who worked for athletic shoes as well as caffeine (read Nike and Starbucks), which by the way are both so interesting and important parts of contemporary cultural vernacular.
Anyhow, I came back to Indore from a very homey MICAmpaign there. Home was brilliant as usual. I fought with mummy over stepping on the wet floor after mopping and over getting proper tickets booked and taking the print-outs on time with my dad and over everything else with my brother. And I also freaked out when my tickets were not done. But as a result I am educated far more in e-ticket booking rules and about how easily my eyes well up sometimes.
Anyhow, we played tennis again after a longish sabbatical. After the first few knocks, our rust also gave way to more freeflowing action :) PK played with her new racquet and I with my new shoes. But they totally bit and bit and now my toe pinkie is a splinters. :( but I will get used to my shoes while they take the shape of my feet, which i'm told are gigantic.
Till I'm able to finish this case on Nike and reading this book, I hope to not call it a night.
Later
Thursday, November 27, 2008
what about enough is enough?
Continued from last maybe....
I've also realized that I have a very striking bald patch, which in some days will become a balder patch, if not tended to. I'm really conscious about it and i'm on 'operation do-something'. So Nerdy has agreed to become my therapist, who'd better do a good job of it or she be fired.
Ofcourse problems become big and small from time to time. For eg. in front of what happened today, in front of the devastation of Bombay, anything else looks litte. So ya, the terrorists did manage to run their assignment to perfection.
They came, they saw and they ravaged. And they killed and killed. It was war and unpleasantness in their truest sense. It was a lot of naked, virulent terror and in places where only a month ago, I was gallivanting and admiring it's sheer brilliance. So clearly, it must affect the victims, the perpetrators and the spectators. It is quite disrupting and not limited to Mumbai. For eg. Back in Indore, my parents have disrupted their lives, upsetting their peace completely because Zoo stays in Mumbai, with whom they keep confronting about how often and for how long to stay outside home these days.
One would think, it's the two biggest hotels of the country, almost symbols of Mumbai's cosmopolitanness. Big places. But that perhaps could be solved with just a better security culture in the country. For some time, some of us are going to feel impatient about the systems that we might have to be put through, but how long could it take to get used to. But no, one can't say anything about anything these days. What would an unassuming family waiting patiently in the waiting room of VT station know or predict or about the modest Nariman house?
How does one forecast terror? But more importantly how does one manage it or better still, how does one fight it?
By depoliticizing it, we may be able to reach somewhere sure. By beefing our terror laws also, we may be able to reach somewhere too. But there comes our famous hypocracy or should I say, binary opposition (thinking). For every man, who wants to shoot the terrorist down, there's another, human right activist who thinks maybe it'd be too inhuman or maybe I don't get it. But again, there's got to be something to arrest such tedious episodes and embarrassments to our country. There are other oppositions. And then there are GDP growth rates, foreign capital, destitution also in our country, with an added issue of terrorism, maybe garbed also in some religious and linguistic sentiments. But anyway, it's all very disillusioning. For an average youth like us, which may not find worthy-enough leaders to follow, it is important to be more cautious in life I think for our own sake.
Even as I write this, I wonder what all these reporters and news-readers would do. It's their bread and butter to brave it out and forego their longed-for sleeps and rest their tired bodies and minds. I also wonder, what must the brave policemen and NSGuards be thinking. Forget about resting and sleeping, do they think of quitting when they go back from work? Ofcourse the dead terrorists must not get a life to do anything or think anything.
But anyway, they say Mumbai has a soul and it will spring back in no time. But then, any other city also would spring back, in its own time ofcourse. But it'd be much less tiring if such interruptions wouldnt happen altogether.
I also like 'Welcome' film a little better. I do not think an average Indian, deserves the insecurities he is made to suffer. Even if, bad democracy has to be fought with bad democracy, it's worth it, once and for all.
We have just followed news and more news today.
The repurcussions are going to be many and long-term affecting trade, sports and everything in between war and peace.
i hope ashok kamte, vijay salaskar and hemant karkare and a whole lot of army men rest in peace because we lost some of the most competent policemen who led from the front.
This whole business of taking lives and ruining many others by the b******s is condemned not only in India but everywhere else, and rightly so. I fail to understand how dastardly these militants can be and how dyslexic would they have to be to not know what a dead-end this war is. Maybe they should make more love and more music and more chocolates and more peace and more babies and more art to really know, ofcourse for their own sake, that life is pretty if you can make it that.
Later
I've also realized that I have a very striking bald patch, which in some days will become a balder patch, if not tended to. I'm really conscious about it and i'm on 'operation do-something'. So Nerdy has agreed to become my therapist, who'd better do a good job of it or she be fired.
Ofcourse problems become big and small from time to time. For eg. in front of what happened today, in front of the devastation of Bombay, anything else looks litte. So ya, the terrorists did manage to run their assignment to perfection.
They came, they saw and they ravaged. And they killed and killed. It was war and unpleasantness in their truest sense. It was a lot of naked, virulent terror and in places where only a month ago, I was gallivanting and admiring it's sheer brilliance. So clearly, it must affect the victims, the perpetrators and the spectators. It is quite disrupting and not limited to Mumbai. For eg. Back in Indore, my parents have disrupted their lives, upsetting their peace completely because Zoo stays in Mumbai, with whom they keep confronting about how often and for how long to stay outside home these days.
One would think, it's the two biggest hotels of the country, almost symbols of Mumbai's cosmopolitanness. Big places. But that perhaps could be solved with just a better security culture in the country. For some time, some of us are going to feel impatient about the systems that we might have to be put through, but how long could it take to get used to. But no, one can't say anything about anything these days. What would an unassuming family waiting patiently in the waiting room of VT station know or predict or about the modest Nariman house?
How does one forecast terror? But more importantly how does one manage it or better still, how does one fight it?
By depoliticizing it, we may be able to reach somewhere sure. By beefing our terror laws also, we may be able to reach somewhere too. But there comes our famous hypocracy or should I say, binary opposition (thinking). For every man, who wants to shoot the terrorist down, there's another, human right activist who thinks maybe it'd be too inhuman or maybe I don't get it. But again, there's got to be something to arrest such tedious episodes and embarrassments to our country. There are other oppositions. And then there are GDP growth rates, foreign capital, destitution also in our country, with an added issue of terrorism, maybe garbed also in some religious and linguistic sentiments. But anyway, it's all very disillusioning. For an average youth like us, which may not find worthy-enough leaders to follow, it is important to be more cautious in life I think for our own sake.
Even as I write this, I wonder what all these reporters and news-readers would do. It's their bread and butter to brave it out and forego their longed-for sleeps and rest their tired bodies and minds. I also wonder, what must the brave policemen and NSGuards be thinking. Forget about resting and sleeping, do they think of quitting when they go back from work? Ofcourse the dead terrorists must not get a life to do anything or think anything.
But anyway, they say Mumbai has a soul and it will spring back in no time. But then, any other city also would spring back, in its own time ofcourse. But it'd be much less tiring if such interruptions wouldnt happen altogether.
I also like 'Welcome' film a little better. I do not think an average Indian, deserves the insecurities he is made to suffer. Even if, bad democracy has to be fought with bad democracy, it's worth it, once and for all.
We have just followed news and more news today.
The repurcussions are going to be many and long-term affecting trade, sports and everything in between war and peace.
i hope ashok kamte, vijay salaskar and hemant karkare and a whole lot of army men rest in peace because we lost some of the most competent policemen who led from the front.
This whole business of taking lives and ruining many others by the b******s is condemned not only in India but everywhere else, and rightly so. I fail to understand how dastardly these militants can be and how dyslexic would they have to be to not know what a dead-end this war is. Maybe they should make more love and more music and more chocolates and more peace and more babies and more art to really know, ofcourse for their own sake, that life is pretty if you can make it that.
Later
long time!
Its been a very very long time since I last wrote and now there are just so many things to write.
Yesterday, Peeks woke, giving me 15 minutes only to give me another 15 minutes exactly 1 hour later to prepare myself for tennis, which I did and then got almost singed in the wintery sun. But then all this delay was also because everyone had his and her own reason. Peeks for example is going to be a little different now. Hers is a new chapter four months away from passing out.
Now i'd also like to bring to your notice how sometimes, non-living things also begin to pay heed to you, so now tennis balls, geyser, water-tap, laptops start to behave the way you want them to by not running amok, giving hot water, giving warm water and not crashing respectively. I thank god for that.
In the last some days I have discovered that cakes smell really badly when they become stale, that there are some very kind and unkind souls who wish you very well. There are many people who just make life so much easier and so much fun, making you feel very special. That is why, this whole tradition of having some days earmarked for just one person is brilliant I think. There are flowers and chocolates and tennis skirts make it even better. I thank God for this.
Continued maybe!
Yesterday, Peeks woke, giving me 15 minutes only to give me another 15 minutes exactly 1 hour later to prepare myself for tennis, which I did and then got almost singed in the wintery sun. But then all this delay was also because everyone had his and her own reason. Peeks for example is going to be a little different now. Hers is a new chapter four months away from passing out.
Now i'd also like to bring to your notice how sometimes, non-living things also begin to pay heed to you, so now tennis balls, geyser, water-tap, laptops start to behave the way you want them to by not running amok, giving hot water, giving warm water and not crashing respectively. I thank god for that.
In the last some days I have discovered that cakes smell really badly when they become stale, that there are some very kind and unkind souls who wish you very well. There are many people who just make life so much easier and so much fun, making you feel very special. That is why, this whole tradition of having some days earmarked for just one person is brilliant I think. There are flowers and chocolates and tennis skirts make it even better. I thank God for this.
Continued maybe!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
how many worlds??
the last two days have thrown at us, a series of questions and really important questions. There's been so much happening in the world, there are so many different times in the world, and I don't just mean time-zones but the state of civilizations. There were concentration camps, which were ghastly, and this could be an understatement. The atrocities that gypsies, jews, homosexuals amongst other non-Nazi or non-Fascist people went through were ofcourse macabre, but the depiction in the films that I have seen today, they seem almost inconceivable.
What is more disturbing that while so many things around us are happening, we live in such isolation with each other. Ofcourse there is a lot of fascination in thinking what must be going on in a relatively low-key geography say Nicaragua or Kazakhstan, but surely we all live in different times, because we have different problems, big and small and different insecurities, big and small to deal with.
But sometimes our daily blithe lives, with a little bit of sport and good food and lectures and assignments and trips and facebook seem so insignificant or ill-deserved and petty in front of such insufferable insults that countries and political systems and civilians and armies and children and lovers have been afflicted with.
The problem might be of too much complacency. Like Mathew says, we think we're above the system. That there are problems that can't reach us. But the more we feel less remote to them, the more sensitive we can become. I am restless, but the storms in my mind come and go. They don't cause much damage, meaning, no sooner that things touch me, than they settle. And there is little I end up doing about something that affected and overwhelmed me so completely just some time back. Not that I'm already back living it up, but I will still become more conforming than I'd liked to be.
That perhaps also makes me more hypocritical than anything else. Just hypothetically, i'd like to see how different I'd be if I were to be the things I can't contemplate being, but I defend and things that don't enjoy acceptance or tolerance in my neighbourhood. I don't think I can spell those things out here, but maybe it could make sense with more than one context.
Also the panoramic view looks vastly different from the much more closer look at life and discoveries of it. While one could try to know everything in this world, there are also the little happinesses and comforts of the family and friends that you could live for. People could come, enjoy themselves like drunks, mind their business and only their own, mix with neighbours and friends and go watch films with children and then with a lot of peace also depart.
What amazes me that everyday, I note down some things about which I'd like to go back and learn more. So there are limitless possibilities. And everyday, there are some things that are completely overpowering and sweeping. There are books and books to read, films and films to watch and art and more of it to appreciate and critique.
But i will never know enough to do anything about many things. At most I can hold views, change them every now and then but at any point of time, also hold them. But I hate to be passive. I have to respond to nature, to media, to films and to problems around me. I have to be more courageous in holding out my opinion. I also have to be much more curious. I have to be less lazy and more responsible for myself. I have to explore much more with my being, invest in my life, and 100% so. I have to stretch and stretch. And I have to also coil up in bed, reading something nice and listening perhaps to 'lay down beside me', thinking about things and people that are loved immensely.
So ofcourse there are concerns and commotions but be assured- the best is yet to be. A little bit of morning, melody, peace, sweetness and happiness every day, every place.
Later
What is more disturbing that while so many things around us are happening, we live in such isolation with each other. Ofcourse there is a lot of fascination in thinking what must be going on in a relatively low-key geography say Nicaragua or Kazakhstan, but surely we all live in different times, because we have different problems, big and small and different insecurities, big and small to deal with.
But sometimes our daily blithe lives, with a little bit of sport and good food and lectures and assignments and trips and facebook seem so insignificant or ill-deserved and petty in front of such insufferable insults that countries and political systems and civilians and armies and children and lovers have been afflicted with.
The problem might be of too much complacency. Like Mathew says, we think we're above the system. That there are problems that can't reach us. But the more we feel less remote to them, the more sensitive we can become. I am restless, but the storms in my mind come and go. They don't cause much damage, meaning, no sooner that things touch me, than they settle. And there is little I end up doing about something that affected and overwhelmed me so completely just some time back. Not that I'm already back living it up, but I will still become more conforming than I'd liked to be.
That perhaps also makes me more hypocritical than anything else. Just hypothetically, i'd like to see how different I'd be if I were to be the things I can't contemplate being, but I defend and things that don't enjoy acceptance or tolerance in my neighbourhood. I don't think I can spell those things out here, but maybe it could make sense with more than one context.
Also the panoramic view looks vastly different from the much more closer look at life and discoveries of it. While one could try to know everything in this world, there are also the little happinesses and comforts of the family and friends that you could live for. People could come, enjoy themselves like drunks, mind their business and only their own, mix with neighbours and friends and go watch films with children and then with a lot of peace also depart.
What amazes me that everyday, I note down some things about which I'd like to go back and learn more. So there are limitless possibilities. And everyday, there are some things that are completely overpowering and sweeping. There are books and books to read, films and films to watch and art and more of it to appreciate and critique.
But i will never know enough to do anything about many things. At most I can hold views, change them every now and then but at any point of time, also hold them. But I hate to be passive. I have to respond to nature, to media, to films and to problems around me. I have to be more courageous in holding out my opinion. I also have to be much more curious. I have to be less lazy and more responsible for myself. I have to explore much more with my being, invest in my life, and 100% so. I have to stretch and stretch. And I have to also coil up in bed, reading something nice and listening perhaps to 'lay down beside me', thinking about things and people that are loved immensely.
So ofcourse there are concerns and commotions but be assured- the best is yet to be. A little bit of morning, melody, peace, sweetness and happiness every day, every place.
Later
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Lord, I hope this day is good!
Mornings and evenings all were the same
And there was no name till I heard your name
But I knew, when i saw you smile
Now I can rest for awhile
I slept for very little while yesterday for today's presentation on taking khadi garments and ethnic indian wear for the indian diaspora to the UK. It was alright, nothing to write home about, but it was good fun, thinking really hard and arguing about things. Even though I try to stay away from arguments, I end up getting into some anyway. Anyhow, I was asked to score one group's presentation, and it turns out that I ended up being the most non-indulgent in giving scores. But good I did it, or I'd never have come to know that I wasn't as lenient as I thought I was. Anyhow, I'll try to think things through much better next time.
But since then, I've been pretty relaxed and finally it feels like a Sunday. So I've tried to make as much out of it as I could. I played tennis for a little while. And I've observed that I like rallies, I like length and I like it even if it means hitting the ball, straight to where it's coming from, in essence never placing it much. Finishing games and killing balls/shuttles has never been on my radar much. Grapes also might be sour, but they may not necessarily be. But tennis is good. It's just about you, and a little about your opponent. Team-games are always very glutted with politics and a classmate who i thought should've been in the team, has not found a place, and even though I do feel he should find one, I havn't been able to make my case because I dont know exactly why he should be in the team. When I find it, I will let know. Because sometimes, what we think is most democratic and fairest turns totally against the whole cause. And also, I think it is hard to put positive and negative dispositions against things aside. That is why they say, 'Education ruined me.'
Anyhow, also some days are simply better than others. Sometimes, one ends up playing the smoothest shot effortlessly and sometimes, after a lot of thought and will also, one ends up goofing it up. And improvement can be very erratic. It crawls and bounds and gallops and then it also sleeps for a long long time.
I'm excited about tomorrow. There's film studies with Mathew tomorrw, after a long time. But also, I have classes the whole day tomorrow. But there's work to be done too. For eg. the rural report. Remember, long time back, we'd gone through the length of south america on a bike. Anyhow, this too shall pass.
till then, Lord I hope this day is good!
Don Williams
And there was no name till I heard your name
But I knew, when i saw you smile
Now I can rest for awhile
I slept for very little while yesterday for today's presentation on taking khadi garments and ethnic indian wear for the indian diaspora to the UK. It was alright, nothing to write home about, but it was good fun, thinking really hard and arguing about things. Even though I try to stay away from arguments, I end up getting into some anyway. Anyhow, I was asked to score one group's presentation, and it turns out that I ended up being the most non-indulgent in giving scores. But good I did it, or I'd never have come to know that I wasn't as lenient as I thought I was. Anyhow, I'll try to think things through much better next time.
But since then, I've been pretty relaxed and finally it feels like a Sunday. So I've tried to make as much out of it as I could. I played tennis for a little while. And I've observed that I like rallies, I like length and I like it even if it means hitting the ball, straight to where it's coming from, in essence never placing it much. Finishing games and killing balls/shuttles has never been on my radar much. Grapes also might be sour, but they may not necessarily be. But tennis is good. It's just about you, and a little about your opponent. Team-games are always very glutted with politics and a classmate who i thought should've been in the team, has not found a place, and even though I do feel he should find one, I havn't been able to make my case because I dont know exactly why he should be in the team. When I find it, I will let know. Because sometimes, what we think is most democratic and fairest turns totally against the whole cause. And also, I think it is hard to put positive and negative dispositions against things aside. That is why they say, 'Education ruined me.'
Anyhow, also some days are simply better than others. Sometimes, one ends up playing the smoothest shot effortlessly and sometimes, after a lot of thought and will also, one ends up goofing it up. And improvement can be very erratic. It crawls and bounds and gallops and then it also sleeps for a long long time.
I'm excited about tomorrow. There's film studies with Mathew tomorrw, after a long time. But also, I have classes the whole day tomorrow. But there's work to be done too. For eg. the rural report. Remember, long time back, we'd gone through the length of south america on a bike. Anyhow, this too shall pass.
till then, Lord I hope this day is good!
Don Williams
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