and life comes a full circle!

Exactly two years back, I was enrolled in a place called MICA. A post-graduate programme with a difference, they say. I don't know how different it is, but I do know it's scaled me completely in two years. I miss soo many things about that eco-system. In a way, MICA has spoilt me without any conscience. And this is in terms of more physical and tangible things. For eg. when I set foot at home, I was met with load-shedding. This totally took my goat. Later, the many plumbing disasters that need attention, took me back to MICA. Then there were the lush and beautifully manicured lawns. The laundry, the internet connection, the 'lan' culture, the fight for more and more shared drive, the complete meals, with both butter-milk and curd. The oh-so close 'chhota' and tt canteens, the credit, and the list goes on.

But there other intangible things also. There is the self-occupation that MICA affords. There you were allowed to stay unnoticed, do anything just by yourself, listen to any kind of music at any volume. At home, that is inconceivable. Everyone is involved with each other. One person's sneezing affects everyone in the house. The food, the temperature, the mood, etc. It's much more intrusive but more feeling. In MICA, there were no right or wrong timings for things. Here there is a right time for bathing and having food. There was no one place or even any place for anything, here there's place for everything. There was little civilization, here that's all there is to see.

What a world that was. People were alike and yet different. They confused me no end.
Collectively they would be mad. Individually they would be madder perhaps. But towards the end, I also realized that the batch would come together and make all things happen. I bow to that experience. I bow to the people, who would follow their dreams with most passion. I bow to also the ups and downs, for they made the journey like a ride. There was learning in the fine details and the broad strokes. In the grounds and the classrooms, in the solitude and togetherness and in every person I rubbed my shoulders with.

And while I am back at home, I have a summer vacation before which i can join work. I believe these might be the last summers, when I can learn to move a little bit in the kitchen, learn a little bit of French, tennis and also learn to plop-plop without having tea :)Therefore, learning doesn't stop. It never will. I will try and make the most out of it, while I can.

Later

no lions..just silhouettes !~

this, dear everyone, could be fairly long. There's just so much going in the head, and it's all churning out there.

I just came back from Gir and it was an experience worth telling. Not the most satisfying trips but 'yeh nahin kiya to kya kiya'. There were let-downs but it was fun, rising above those.
there were no lions in the Gir to be spotted. no luck with the lionesses either. Route six, however, allowed some of us a distant silhouette of a leopard. But nevermind that.
Safaris are great fun. Especially the Gir Safari. A large stretch of natural habitat, with 359 (in number) lions. Many thousands spotted deer and a wide variety of beautiful, exotic birds such as the 'night-jug' and the 'owl'. The owl, with its eyes open in the day. i believe they sleep with their eyes open.

Anyhow, PK, Juggy and Aunaunya and PK's friend were great company to have. For PK, lions mean everything. Everytime she heard something remotely sounding as 'lions', she would feel a surge of disappointment for not having to encounter one.

Anyhow, but like the great ones say about the journey being important and all that, I truly believe it's the safari, the sambhars and the spotted deer and not the lions and leopards that are coveted. The forests were barren and the hope was overwhelming. The ride was bumpy and the heat immense. But maybe I'll need to go a third time to be able to spot anything, because the probability in any case is 1/3rd, and I should have known that second visit was merely a formality.

Money-wise, it burnt a bit of a hole. But i never knew this is how foreign nationals are charged. I mean, i probably had known that these government run, touristy places do manage to charge foreign nationals more, but because we had such an immediate reason to worry for PK's German friend was with us, I never cared maybe. However it is, he is going back with an impression that Indians=Greedy, immoral bunch of conmen. My guess is that when he mentioned something about Indians being this way or that, he was never talking about us. This makes me believe that the touristy image of Indians still holds. Anyhow, for me, I will try to economize elsewhere.

There were all kinds of auto-rickshaws that we tried. And it was all great fun. And it was all very tiring also. And it was a little unbelievable. Because our place of stay was a little shady, some farmhouse, with little trace of much more civilization. In fact, very close to the sanctuary itself. We had the dainties food, cooked food, along with chutneys and pickles and freshly-made butter. Stomach-upset was a fear but in the many experiments, why should this be compromised.

There were some fresh realizations. Sometimes PK hums and I sing. I saw the whole stretch of a train. The WHOLE stretch in one glance, I mean without having to proceed it. I get used to a place and the loo in a much shorter time. When you try to wrap a wet towel around your jeans, for it to dry, the jeans soak the wet up before the sun dries it up. Sometimes head spins like crazy, making me afraid to close my eyes. I can see the sky change colours, when I'm playing tennis or sitting in the near-by tall tanki. It's vivid. Like a fast-foward film that shows day to night. I, sometimes make mental notes of the things I write about. And I lose the notes ever so often. I get inordinately excited and fascinated with all these small villages that I cross while travelling. The distance and the fact that I will never be able to visit that house, in which that frame hangs add to the enchantment. And ofcourse I like Prawns. They are a yummy thing.

Anyhow, there's lots happening with the people around me. My parents, Zoo, they are all going through huge dilemmas. I have no idea what I think about these dilemmas or how I think about them. But they are there for resolve.

There are other egos, how I have no idea become a little insurmountable. I have seen myself talking to people about how it's just about that big leap and being able to start talking, but it's difficult I would say but it's not one of those impossible things.


These days, people let their status messages talk no end. While MICA comes to an end, reading status messages and their count-downs are very interesting. I might take a while before my status message or my status become, one of nostalgia. I might take a while before I take that leap i was talking about. But before that there are soaked clothes to be washed, final matches to be won or lost and some nice food to be eaten. Till then.

Later

and this my friends, is MICA for you and MICA for me!

mica comes to an end. In a week. Might or might not miss it. Might miss it more than might not miss it. will miss the picturesque mornings and the still evenings. will probably miss chhota and tt. will miss this brand of laziness.

will miss the indiscipline. the crazy nights on assignments but more on playing baddy.

tennis. nights of incessant chatting with friends and neighbours.
will miss the promises of discipline though. and the latest nights at pat's with lots to drink and eat. with talks of love and hate. of life. of change. but mostly change and it's off the beaten track-ness. change mica has brought. lots of it. it's made me think. It's made me meet so many other people, culturally so diverse. it is a like a different geography, away from the influences of civilization.

Another civilization with it's own rules of sleep, drink, eat. Eat 4 meals per day complete with papad, dal, rice, salad, falka. the little bricked routes. Will miss the double and the single rooms. and the endless frustrating nights with mice. the sleepy nights with no recollection and the sleepless nights with the unpainted cement of the roof. will miss not brushing before lunch. will miss the luxury of not bathing (which I think is slightly over-rated anyway). zoo's and minkie's visits. and the tension i've borne because of them.

Will miss the uninterrupted net connections. will not know how much i sleep each day, because i have no idea when the day begins and ends. everyday passes without stopping to tell. much like the approaching trees in a moving train, that quickly rush past us. will miss dunking birthday girls and boys. the never-ending one and a half hour long classes. the 15 minutes long breaks. will miss the friends and acquaintances i met here, both good and bad. i respect them all. they all have some goodness. i will miss realizations that they help me reach faster. realizations such as they might not be the best people on earth, but since they are friends, they will be much more important perhaps than the best people on earth. will miss being counseled and counselling. the teasing and taking digs at people. but more importantly being teased (for the failure of the first).

Will miss being culturalized, being abused left right and centre. Will miss abusing immensely. Will miss people not getting scandalized on being abused.

Will miss the every kind of class, creed, colour and caste that treaded the paths of MICA with me. will miss writing like this, while the laptop rests on my stomach, the screen propped up. Will miss rains. will miss rains just too much. will miss silver oak, parijat and even chandni. will miss the placement processes. both summer and final. will even miss roxy, the best dog i've seen, though he still makes me uncomfortable. will miss going out ever so often.

I will probably not miss the uncertainty, the indiscipline, the variety, the individualism, the change, the assembly line, the 'trying-to-be-like-a -MICAN', the one and a half hour long classes, the endless assignments, the dissertation woes, the misfortune of being slotted with the strictest faculty panels. Will not miss the worst rodents that frequented my place. will not miss the oh-so-dirty loos that i got sometimes. And will not miss the things i missed in their good days, on bad ones. And sometimes also miss the things i did not mention I'll miss, in times when the worse rubs against me.

But whether I miss or don't miss these things, i can never forget, and every once in a while be stormed to remember because they are indelible impressions. And indelible impressions they will remain.

Later

I believe in love- By Don Williams

I don’t believe in superstars, organic food and foreign cars
I don’t believe the price of gold, the certainty of growing old
That right is right and left is wrong
That north and south can’t get along
That east is east and west is west, and being first is always best

But I believe in love
I believe in babies
I believe in Mom and Dad
And I believe in you

I don’t believe that heaven waits for only those who congregate
I like to think of God as love, He’s down below, He’s up above
He’s watching people everywhere, he knows who does and doesn’t care
And I’m an ordinary man, sometimes I wonder who I am

But I believe in love
I believe in music
I believe in magic
And I believe in you

Well I know in all my certainty
What’s goin’ on with you and me
Is a good thing
Its true
I believe in you

I don’t believe virginity is as common as it used to be
In working days and sleeping nights,
that black is black and white is white
That Superman and Robin Hood are still alive in Hollywood
That gasoline’s in short supply, the rising cost of getting by

But I believe in love
I believe in old folks
I believe in children
And I believe in you

:D Thank You

Later

Thank You god for the last year. Thank You for everything. Hope good things are in store. Hope I get to learn a lot from the kindness and goodness and imbibe some of them. Thanks for the lovely times and the togetherness. Thank You also for the absence (or I would never know the silkiness of the voice). Thank You for the distant touch. And thank You also for the more familiar caress. (They both are most coveted). Thank You for helping me open up a little bit and unravel to opportunities. Thank You for the first few times. And thank god also, they sped past me or I would never get to see the last few ones (And they were brilliant too).
I thank you for the privilege of sight and smell and touch and taste and sound. For how they're magic in tandem. But more importantly sight of apples and smell of perfumed hair and clothes and touch of sweet moles and the sound of drunken voices losing clarity of speech or not-so-drunken voices articulating in the same rhythm every time and the taste of food most delicious.
I hope life presents many an occasion to celebrate and party. To discover and explore more wonderful things or to keep those old wonderful things, wonderful eternally. But even if that were not to happen, O God, I belong here, and here only :)